Why I Liked... Main Street (2010)

(Dir. John Doyle Starring: King Firth, Amber Tamblyn, Orlando Bloom, Patricia Clarkson, Ellen Burstyn)

Colin Firth, even in a Texan accent (though I have no way of telling how good it actually is), remains flawless.

Now, let’s get down to business, shall we? *cracks knuckles*

More than anything else, this felt like the first part in a mini-series. This film is not complete, and to see the credits rolling by after what is deemed a very unmemorable ending (I’m pretty sure I can only remember the penultimate ending), I can only feel like I’ve been patronised for the past 92 minutes (yeah, it’s a short film) about a world I know nothing about. Yeah, so I didn’t grow up in a small, slowly decaying town-so what? Tell me about it, show me it, explain to me what’s happening-don’t just go on your merry little way and leave it hanging where all us city cats have no idea what’s next.

To tell you the truth, when I uh, acquired, this film, its poster made it look like a romping, good time, Ocean’s 11 type film. You know, with con artists. Though I guess I must not have really looked at the thing, because if Ellen Burstyn is supposed to be in a film about con artists, then...yeah. My fault, I guess.

This heist involved stabbing loads of people with knitting needles.

Ok ok, so instead of being annoyed at the film, maybe I should at least try to give examples as to where it succeeded.

So very often when British actors (and American actors-but in this case...) attempt the American voice, I find it hard to disconnect them from their British roots. In the case of Colin Firth however, the supposedly Texan accent worked really well. Maybe not for the film’s narrative and plot, but it certainly made me incredibly wary about his character. He turned into JR from Dallas, and it made me question everything he said, everything he did. His accent turned him into the villain of the film, even though he wasn’t supposed to be.

Orlando Bloom, on the other hand, seemed to disappear completely into his American mimicry. I almost didn’t recognise him when he started speaking. I’m not quite sure whether to now compliment his slightly improved acting range, or to mention how completely pointless his character was to the story. Let’s just assume I did both.

A story about small town America-Durham, North Carolina. A small story with small action, and small pace. In the very beginning we are set up to believe that Gus Leroy (Firth) is out to make money (which he is), and that his way of doing so is nefarious, evil almost. No, that’s just the way the rest of the characters treat him. He’s actually setting out to help the dying town, surprise surprise.

Ok, so then what next? People planning on moving to Raleigh (Tamblyn), a small town cop deciding to do research on hazardous waste as if there’s a conspiracy going on (Bloom), and an aging tobacco heiress (Burstyn) going broke while her niece (Clarkson) tries to help from the sidelines.

All of this, added in the correct portions could have ended up creating a compelling drama about Durham, North Carolina. But it didn’t. Or did it?

For a film about such a small place, it stuck with small themes. There was no explosion, no revelation about family secrets, no coffee cart declarations of love. Just a day in the life, almost. Which I suppose is a lot more true to life than adding in a bunch of extra dramatic gimmicks, but...at the same time, this is a movie. The audience needs to be captured, needs to be absorbed into the plot with no way of getting out until the film says so.

And Main Street doesn’t do that. At all. It had so many chances to, but it didn’t. It showed great restraint, actually-from an Erin Brockovich type conspiracy to dating a married man, Main Street didn’t necessarily take the easy way out, it just took the normal way out.

Not everything new and money-based is evil and out to get you.

Not every relation with a married man turns into Fatal Attraction.

Not every bump leads to an explosion.

Sometimes these things just happen, and we, the absurdly normal people who experience them, just continue on with our lives, and then mosey on into the cinema to watch the trials and tribulations of “normal people” and how they deal with their lives via musical montages.

So here we are-I can no longer decide if Main Street is good or not. It’s a story about a small town, so it continues on in that motif-so at least it’s consistent? But then again, I also just didn’t really like it as a film. I enjoy watching romances be about love and hate, and frankly, having Colin Firth don a Texan accent and not be on par with Lord Voldemort just seems like a bit of a waste.